Diary Entries

My family never hugged. Maybe very occasionally mum and dad would hug, no, thinking honestly about it, I only saw them hug once. I grew up not hugging, or wanting a hug. I got through life quite nicely without hugging. When I was older, friends noticed my behaviour, and remarked I was standoff-ish. I wasn't you know, I just didn't hug. My family later started to hug, well, some did, some still don't. Those that hugged accepted that I don't and those that still don't hug understood. Friends would sometimes force a hug on me, so I clumsily hugged them back. They would laugh in play. Think it was funny. "See, I got you to hug!" But they really didn't, my heart wasn't in it. The last time I saw my mother alive, she said 'Come on, give your old mother a hug". So I did. A week later she was dead. This was three years ago but I can feel our last hug wrapping around my chest today. Covid-19 stopped everyone from hugging. I now understand the power of the hug. And now we can't. It could kill someone.

Over four billion years ago earth’s first sunrise dawned, not long after that the oceans formed. Deep, deep down in the cold dark, Something stirred, the very first spark. Fuelled by superhot hydrothermal vents, This thing we know as life commenced. All creatures came from that water, Every son, every daughter. She can create life… and as easily take it away again, as her storms destroy the work of men. She is beauty, she is power, She gives me fish and chips and a nice hot shower. She gives us the cooling breezes, she gives us fun, She gives us holidays and laughter in the sun. But it’s not all good, not all fantastic, She’s drowning in a sea of plastic. The biggest threat she’s ever faced Is that we keep filling her with our waste. What if she tires or her power starts to fail? Will she live on, or will she give up and set sail? But today there’s a fresh swell and more waves came, I love that she’s always changing, never the same. Pink zinc on, sleepy eyes still crusty, I walk to the beach past cars her breath turns rusty. She has the power to take away my sadness, to help me escape this COVID madness. Surfing is my happy place, as she wraps me in her salty embrace.

The Slow Lane It is gloomy again, hard to tease the sun out this Autumn, camellias are blooming without a care. I wonder if I should get out of bed for another at home, nothing day. Find it difficult to get excited about the anything, not like before. Discipline is the best. Routine. This virus has infected my brain, my ability to hope and visualise the new order the new good day. I crawl out of bed, dress and make a strong coffee. Now I am better, much better. How things have changed, now little things matter. Before I could spend a day without combing my hair, now it is important, without it I am not ready. Maybe I'll even wear a flower in my hair. I made a promise, bet with friends that we'd dress every morning, comb our hair, put on lipstick and smile for a little while at least. Today I will wear a pink Camelia in my hair. It helps me ease into another isolation day in the studio, where words are hammered into shape and paintings emerge. Suddenly it is ok. COVID, you and I have made an unquiet peace; for now anyway.

I decided to use the time to grow a beard. In my mind it would possibly look like the beards of the Czar and his cousin the King when they were photographed together prior to the First World War. I have never had one before, just a daily smudge of rough shadow that appears each afternoon, and a few days stubble most weekends. Prior to now I hadn't considered letting a beard grow. The scruffy period before it would be fully formed would look like neglect, and that just wouldn't do. After 3 weeks my beard is quite full, spiky, dark in parts and streaked with grey. It doesn’t look like I had imagined, rather I am a slightly wolfish version of myself. I’ve checked it from a few angles and I think it would look acceptable in public. Having said that, I’m not entirely convinced so I don’t think it will last.

G'day. It's been a while since I ever wrote to myself. I mean, last time I did this type of thing was when I had to write to myself everyday because I was told to let my mum know what was going on last year. It was my brother's birthday yesterday and we had a miniature party. We played pass the parcel and we did a pinata, which I beheaded. But it wasn't exciting, since at the party, it was just me, my brothers, my mum and my dad. My brother loves Mariokart, so I got him a Mariokart Hot Wheels track. He loves it. The last 2 months have been a bit confusing for me. For example, the last time i went to school apart from last Monday, everyone was on the verge of murdering me. It wasn't until I went on to Quotev when everyone revealed that everyone wanting to kill me was a prank. I don't know whether to believe them or not. Because, my friend, Katie said that she wanted me to die and then yesterday she revealed that after a few weeks she decided she was tired of getting angry at me and wanted to be friends again. You can tell that things have been a bit confusing. Well, I best be going now, I mean I did just spend most of my English class writing this. I actually need to do some other work now. Until Next time,

Well life has certainly been a little different over the last two months with COVID 19. People are working from home, children are being home schooled via online methods and there is little social interaction. We are spending more time at home and only leaving for exercise, shopping for groceries, medical appointments and little else. I have two children, a five year old and a nine year old. They do miss being able to visit playgrounds (as they are closed) and seeing their friends. We have done lots more bike rides and playing in the backyard, also playing board games. Both my children are looking forward to going back to the school for lessons. They miss the school environment and even though they see their teacher and classmates online it is not the same as physically being at school. We are grateful that we have been safe, have had plenty of good food to eat and have a secure home to live in. This global pademic could have been a lot worse but to be honest whilst things are different and there are inconveniences we feel that as a family and a society in general we have been very fortunate. We are sad for those that have lost their lives to the virus and we hope that Australia continues to manage the virus so that less people are affected.

The very part about all this is 100% the memes. The internet really pulled itself together when faced with this shite and its honestly what has kept me sane. And I'm not even on tiktok.

Locked down in lock down I'm serving time but I will make time serve me Locked down in lock down 4 walls within 4 walls with the vast expansion of imagination Swimming in an endless pool of my own thoughts called isolation But this compared to how much bigger this is or how much bigger it is It's like dropping a ring in a desert and that ring is another desert and then dropping another ring in that desert and so on It's time to reflect and use my imagination the only power I have, through being locked up in lock up. All my other powers have been stripped off me due to circumstances because all my actions, thoughts, opinions and beliefs will become a product of what I want around me.

Corona Virus or CoVid-19 came so unexpectedly It's sad to see so many lives lost. These also including the ones underground R.I.P. But also the mum that can't go to work Can't feed her kids The man that is now homeless And struggling with a mental breakdown The family's with Infected loved ones Corona virus is like a pack of wolves Singles out the weak & vulnerable and attacks We need to remember to bubble ourselves and take time to really think Stop getting caught up with the rubbish around us The media, internet & all the gossip Yes Corona virus is bad and it's out of our hands But make something good out of a bad situation My idea and opinion is that Corona Virus has given us time to think and come back to peace within ourselves.

Time away from school is supposed to be fun, enjoyable and just relaxing. This time away from school was deadly, life-threatening and terrifying. To live in the time of a huge pandemic is a memory I will never forget, hand sanitiser with me everywhere I go, no hugs, less and less human interaction. How long will it last? How long will we have to suffer? When, when will it end? These are questions we ask, when and how, asking for this pandemic to end. But we forget what matters. What about all this time we have to spend quality time with our families? The baking, the bike riding, the card games and the board games. This is how we are impacted by this large pandemic, but not all is bad as you see. I'm sure you all have had some great times at home. Just keep in mind, bad isn't all bad, we have some highs to staying home. We have to remember what keeps us going in times like these, our families, our friends, our teachers, our classmates, just some of these people can make an impact in our lives whether we see them or not. Yes, ups and downs come around and sometimes they aren't as large as this one, but we've got to keep in mind that it will pass, human research and development will grow, so don't freak out about all of these ban things happening and try to remember all of the good things instead. Overall, we want to fight this, we can fight this, we will fight this. Remember, we will always have someone with us no matter what, whether it's a parent, sibling, cousin, friend, classmate or teacher, they know what you're going through and together you will fight trough it.