CORONIAL EXERCISES FOR CENTENARIANS
Some folk are motivated
And need no exhortation
To do their daily exercise
While we're in isolation.
There's those who've painted houses
And made them nice and neat,
But we're too old to do this
And so we can't compete.
On cold days when it's raining,
They're inside lifting weights,
Or zooming into yoga
To push up their heart rates.
But we wish to re-assure you,
So we've made a weighty list
Of daily exercises
That we never miss:
First thing every morning
We JOG our memory:
No need to go out running,
You surely must agree?
After this exertion
We SQUEEZE into our clothes,
And when putting on our slippers
We almost TOUCH OUR TOES.
The cats check out our BALANCE
As they smooch around our legs
And our arms receive a WORKOUT
As we scratch their furry heads.
We decide that we will check out
Our FLEXI-BILI-TY
Doing knitting, reading, crosswords
With a cat upon each knee.
And government departments
Have us CLIMBING walls
JUMP on line they tell us
We're not taking any calls.
We RUN OUT of forbearance,
We RUN UP huge phone bills
While others are out planting
Lots of daffodils.
So we try to LIFT our spirits
With vodka, rum and gin,
Plus LUNGES on our walkers
When our heads begin to SPIN.
WEIGHT LIFTING and WEIGHT BEARING
Did we hear you say?
Our scales keep on confirming
We're BEARING more of us each day!
We cannot understand it,
What on earth can be the cause?
It seems our house is needing
Rooms with double doors!