Diary Entries

What can I say about Covid-19? Firstly, it's made all of us hermits. We venue out of the house to the garden and back in again and then repeat the process the next day (it's lucky we have a beautiful big yard.) It's like Groundhog Day for the most part. Home-schooling is a new challenge, especially when balancing working from home at the same time. The kids though, they're loving this. Both are on the spectrum and are happy to stay home all the time. In fact, the youngest told his teacher (via Zoom) that he did not miss school and wanted to keep doing school at home forever. The only benefit from this whole ordeal is that patisseries are now delivering. I'm pretty happy about that.

(Unrequited) love in the time of covid. “I mean, when you like somebody, proximity is a good thing, regardless of how they feel about you. Or don't, as the case may be.” - Pacey, Dawson’s Creek My affliction is unrequited love. For my manager. I have accepted that I may never get over him completely but as with most crippling diseases it comes down to symptom management. According to my online research the first step is to “cut off contact” ergo out of sight, out of mind. To help get over him I needed to get away from him but the problem was that my job required daily interaction with him. The lockdown measures came as an unexpected blessing. Admittedly there are downsides to working from home but I am revelling in the upsides. I appreciate not having to wake up to an alarm and not having to navigate public transport. I like dialling in to meetings. I can have a siesta. Most importantly I don’t have to see him. I’m no longer distracted by his proximity - I’m not as anxious or self-conscious or moody. I get more work done. It is only under such exceptional circumstances that one who is in enforced confinement can nevertheless feel liberated. There is increasing talk of easing restrictions. What does that mean for me and my unfortunate infatuation? I’ll cross the bridge when I get there. In the meantime I’m going to enjoy my sleep ins while I can.

For me being online schooled is hard but I get through the day, at school at recess and lunch I would normally be playing tip and running around a lot but since I've been in quarantine I haven't been getting much exercise apart from a half-hour run now and then.

Where do I start... Well, right now things are running wild in my head about how much our world has changed in only a small amount of time. Before the spike of the coronavirus hit me and my family were travelling to the other side of Australia, Until we arrived at a small town in SA where our ears were constantly listening to updates on this pandemic. The Borders may be closing, those words changed a very special holiday. The sad thing is we are only making this trip was because my sister lives in WA The next day we packed our stuff up and headed home with a few days with around 6 hour drives until the last stretch with 16 hours of being confined in a car knowing that when i get home i wont even be able to see the ones i miss the most. Don't leave unless necessary they said, that was the hardest thing. Being so close to people that bring joy to you but in your mind and reality you can feel their presence. You sit there with levels of boredom going crazy remembering the last times you saw them, heard their voice. starting online school, what a pain . Independence is key, but when you sometimes struggle with understanding things like maths, for the first time I said to myself I can't wait to go back to school. while I sit here and type I am looking out my window at the beautiful outside world that used to be filled with so much joy, now you aren't always allowed out. Though the restrictions are lifting and we are going to school once a week starting next week. its weird to think that getting up was a normal occurrence That was Covid19 isolation 2020

Thursday 7th May My dog Bouncer aged 11yr had been sick for a few weeks and had lost a lot of weight. I was monitoring his health but on the morning of Saturday 2nd May he was unable to get down the stairs to the backyard as he always had and I noticed once he settled again he couldn't scratch himself and yelped in pain. I rang the Great Western Animal Hospital and was told to bring him in. I knew in my heart what the outcome would be and was trying to prepare myself. We were driven there by my son and his girlfriend, with Bouncer and I in the back seat. On arrival we had to call reception (Due to Covid 19 restrictions) who advised they would come out to us. We sat in the car for over half an hour and it was the sadest but beautiful and funny time. We got to tell him how much we loved him and all the stories of his life. He sat on my lap in the sun, (he loved the sun). The Vet called me on my mobile and I was told to drop him off to an assistant at the designated drop off point and they would have a look at him. The assistant took him with such care. The Vet called and asked me to come in, I was greeted by the assistant with a face mask. I saw him and said "I've got ya little Bouncey" The outcome was grim so the hardest decision was made, to put him to sleep. Tears and mucus all flowing under the mask as I held him until his last heart beat. Bouncer had been through so much in my life but those last moments in the car live forever.

Is the sky more blue, or is it just me? Did I just see a butterfly land in that tree? Pelican squadrons, no planes overhead! No sounds of traffic to do in my head! The cockatoos are raiding the garden once more. Am I noticing more than I have done before? Working from home seemed quite awkward at first But I don’t miss the peak-hour trains fit to burst. Family meals at the table, with love prepared, Conversations that travel to places we daren’t. Rediscovered embroidery, kits left incomplete, Bought when children were small, but neglected for sleep. We hanker for arts, watch ballet on TV, To go to the theatre, oh when will that be? Shopping’s now “scavenging”, against everyone. Chuckling at those on the loo paper run. I like my pyjamas – a little too much! Who wants to wear makeup, tackle hair with a brush? Who knew one’d be hirsute, when no one can see. When I look in the mirror and discover - it’s me! I peer through my door at the wide world outside, See others go walking, taking bikes for a ride. My beam’s getting broader, I know it is so, But when I tell my feet, “Move!”, they only say, “No!” Shall we talk about wine? No. Maybe not. Let’s leave that to languish in the land time forgot! I now talk to my freezer Saying thanks for her work. Perhaps that sounds strange… Am I going berserk? When this madness is over, back to normal’s the thing You’ll find me in a corner With a bottle of gin!

The day I saw the water drops, The friend in my life dropped together. The day I see the flower blooms, The life and the day bloomed together. The day I see a happy starting point, The day end quite bad to me. The day I see the sunshine, The dreamed came true by my day.

I actually didn't know that this "Diary Entry" existed but I love it Imagine if the Corona lasted till the last days What will you do then????? Do we have to live in Isolation forever or will we walk out in the open and be one with nature????? Thoughts thoughts thoughts I also hope for everyone to be healthy and safe xx

I am a psychotherapist, preferring talking and active therapy to drugs (unless absolutely necessary). The 'stay home' period has opened up much more online activity for therapy. I have patients as far as Gosford, who would normally catch a train, a bus and then walk to get to me, then reverse to go home. These days we use FaceTime/Skype/Zoom, and these are almost as good as face-to-face sessions. It could become the norm for uptimes to 80% of all sessions. The COVID-19 shutdown has forced new communications means, and I, for one, am very happy about this.

Dear Grandma (Myrtle) Things have changed since you left us all those years ago. I know that you went through some major world events and lived a more frugal and simpler way of life than I. You always gave us positive comments and love when we were children particularly when we stayed with you during the school holidays where we enjoyed our trips to Manly on the ferry and to the Coles Cafeteria in the City. You made use clothes and knitted us jumpers for the winter and kissed and cuddled us when we saw you always greeting us with a smile. You were then and still now looking over us. Now I am a grandmother and I can't cuddle my granddaughter or my daughters and family because we have a pandemic. I have been able to see my granddaughter but always at arms length not a natural way to be. I hope we can have a hug again soon because it's not good for humans to keep their distance only at this moment in time. I visit Mum your daughter in law behind a glass window in the nursing home. She is confused in this strange new world. We haven't been allowed to visit for the last seven weeks but have made arrangements to go to see her tomorrow. Seven weeks is a long time at ninety one and with failing health she is longing to be in heaven with our beloved Dad your son. Each day I wake thinking this is a bad dream but the morning sun still shines in through the window and brings hope that this moment will soon pass and we'll connect with our families and friends again and build a better world where we all appreciate each other and the life we have.